What makes me special

Well, nothing, maybe.
I argued that point as much as I possibly could.  I thought it would be foolish to think highly of my own ability.  First of all, I couldn't expect myself to be able to judge myself correctly, and second of all, I'd lose my reason to push myself, my drive to improve, if I thought I was already good.  If I wanted to show that there was truly something special about me, it was going to have to be through some kind of undeniable proof.  And the one least accepting of any of it was going to be me.
Few things are absolute.  It was very likely that I would never find that certain proof I required of myself.  Still, there were some things that were hard to deny.

Teachers and classmates probably figured that it was math that was my specialty, although my old physics teacher would also recognize my skills in physics, my old chemistry teacher wouldn't doubt my skills in chemistry, etc...  Sure I was good at math, but I've competed in enough math competitions that I didn't win to know that it was possible to be better.
A glance through my YouTube channel might make you think that video games or maybe programming was what I was best at.  Well, I really didn't have as much programming experience as I could have, and as for video games, for many of the things I did someone existed who could do them better.
The thing is, I don't think it's one thing specifically that I'm good at.  I think it's... well...
everything.


A culmination of everything, that is.  It seemed to be that I had some talent for just about everything I cared to try.  It was as if I was able to pick up most things faster than others, be it with school, video games, sports...  It is my belief that this is what allowed me to be able to do so many things.  Maybe it was an ability to learn.  Maybe it was intelligence.
Although...  1) I really only did the things I was good at, avoiding the things I wasn't good at, to give off an impression that I was good at everything.  2) I had more opportunities than most other people.  3) Or most other people never tried as hard to be good at the things I was good at, and the people who did were better than me.  4) Besides, if it was a comparison with other people, I couldn't have an accurate answer because I didn't really know the abilities of other people very well.  5) And it's better to be really good at one thing than okay at many things anyway.
What can I say?  Maybe that's all true.

I doubted my ability to evaluate myself correctly, but at the same time, I didn't believe anyone else could do it either.  Anyone else would be missing crucial facts.  They wouldn't know the things I had tried and could not do.  They wouldn't know the things that I was already capable of.
There was one crucial fact that stood out.  It meant an opportunity, a potential, and I was glad for that.  Despite that, it was perhaps the most painful fact in my life.  It is that I could have always done, and even now still can do...

...

more.